Take a Stand

hi pple

2008-05-29T01:07:00.001+08:00

i lost this blog for some long time. yes. lost it when my computer crash. i dun rmb my password =)
http://abidingin.wordpress.com/

Yay!

2006-12-11T13:53:00.000+08:00

YAY! xmas is coming! =) such a happening week! cant wait till 20th when i get my hands on my sony ercisson phone! there will be many gifts but let us not forget the greatest gift which is Love!

love

2006-09-17T18:38:00.000+08:00

when someone give you something they love very much. That is love! sweet =) i am glad God created cocca trees!

Not home yet

2006-07-11T00:21:00.000+08:00

Not home yet

When i used the nick “not home yet” in msn. People comes to me and ask “if you are not at home then where were are you?” “if u r not home using internet then where are you?” What i really mean from “not home yet” is not because of as a “physically home”. What i refer to is my home is heaven, this world is not my home. My final stop is not this world, but heaven. =)

Marvelous Light

2006-07-10T10:01:00.000+08:00

Marvelous Light

it seems coincidence that every time i am feeling really down, during those important period of time i make break-thru, the song marvelous light is always played. Somehow, the song seems like encouraging me, cheering me up. Maybe God choose the song. =) Anyway for those who have no idea, its my favorite song. Great week ahead!

Father brother me

2006-07-09T23:47:00.000+08:00

Father brother me

It is the final of world cup today. I myself dun watch soccer not even world cup matches so far. But i would like to spend time with my dad doing the same thing and stuff. It will be exciting! So i went to buy lots of junkies and choc and biscuit. Something that i dont know, my dad did the same, he went and brought tibits and drinks. And as for my brother, whom i dunno what give him to idea to buy bread and buns haha! Now we have much to eat while watching world cup at 2am! Cant wait =) its funny to see everyone buying almost the same thing cool!

2006-07-02T19:34:00.000+08:00

Shaken

Still shaken. this death was a hit to our platoon. He said nothing. but out of the platoon, i guess this hurt me the most. becuase i am the only christian. its just so hard to see a friend leaving you. esp when he is a non christian. his death has really changed me. it reminds me there is much to do. much to share. its time to move on..and its time to work harder! with the help of God!

death

2006-07-01T23:22:00.000+08:00

another day another death

its not even after a month and another death knocks on the door. My fren committed sucide at home this sat. i cant even believe it. the tough days we went thru in our army life. now he has left us. a death of a friend. a death of a soilder.

guitar

2006-06-25T18:23:00.000+08:00

Guitar

I suddenly have a urge to learn guitar! because it can deepens my praise and worship to God! hmm time to find a guitar!

My wallet

2006-06-25T18:01:00.000+08:00

My wallet.

I love my wallet for a special reason. Not because it holds money and all the atm cards. But inside my wallet contains something priceless. Inside there are encouragement cards I received from all my sisters and brothers if I am able to put it into it though haha! Once in a while I will take dem out to look when I feeling down and such. And it always remind friends are always there for you when you need them =)

Selling it away

2006-06-25T17:56:00.000+08:00

Selling it away

Who would have thought I will sell away one of the most wanted gadget the nds lite away.(nds lite is a handheld console to play games) Though its fun to have one but I feel it will become a stumbling block to my Christian life. You spend time playing and the time is lost. Why not use the time for something meaningful for God? The day before I went for conference I prayed God if it is your will that I should remove this from my life then please let me find a buyer for it right after the conference. And amazingly there is a buyer who would buy my set for a good price!

Though pple say i am dumb to sell it away but somehow without it, I felt more contented. I don’t know why but this feeling is great!

Let it out

2006-06-18T18:52:00.000+08:00

Hillsong london and planet shakers new album is out! need to get it but it seems only sks is selling it..ahmm.. getting pumped up with all all the events that is coming up. Youth alive is coming to Singapore! =) cant wait!

Shout shout shout it out! Jesus is Lord!

..

2006-06-11T20:20:00.000+08:00

dun think i will ever learn how to cope with death of someone. . it was my book out day when i got the message.. a weekend after so much training.. but i just feel so sad.. things is still running, people doing the things they do but one of us is gone. during the wake, tears just fall. u cant control them. no point to. as we mourn for the death of our sister. but now i begin to see things mroe clearly now. not much time left. much to do much to share =)

see you in heaven dear sister

Time to make a stand

2006-06-04T19:10:00.000+08:00

Time to make a stand

Its time to make a stand! No more half baked!

army

2006-06-03T11:55:00.000+08:00

Back from camp. tired legs, tired body, burised legs and hands. Its just the first week of my new course in army. what worst? next week. sleep at 12+ wake up at 4+ outfield. not a good routine as all. Sometimes it just makes u wonder why u r in one of the toughest vocation in army. thats what everyone in my team is thinking right now. Please let this 2 mth course end!

my phone contacts is lost! lost all the contacts with some of my old friends. Please contact me soon!

2006-04-20T17:37:00.000+08:00

here i am again! 4 blogs in 1 day haha just want to put this song lyrics up. wanted to put this song in the blog but forgot the coding hehe. this song is what i am feeling now. i love this song =)

From The Inside Out

A thousand times I've failed
Still Your mercy remains And should I stumble again
I'm caught in Your grace
Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame

Your will above all else
My purpose remains
The art of losing myself
In bringing You praise
Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame

In my heart and my soul
Lord I give You control
Consume me from the inside out
Lord let justice and praise
Become my embrace
To love you from the inside out

Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame
And the cry of my heart
Is to bring You praise
From the inside out
Lord my soul cries out

2006-04-20T16:42:00.000+08:00

Dreams

just watched a movie in the afternoon. The movie name is Goal. it talks about a young man trying his best to get into a football team. This is his dream and he never stopped or hesitate to going towrds it. tho the story is like many others. but it bring to me back to my dream. I stopped and think. Am i pursing my dream now? its time to kick the ball rolling even if i am overseas.

What is overseas when u have God!

pack

2006-04-20T16:28:00.000+08:00

i know i am bloggin so much now haha! but just wanna write this

your worst days are never so bad that you are beyond the reach of God's grace & our best days are never so good that you are beyong God's grace =D

pack pack pack!

A few hours before take off

2006-04-20T15:43:00.000+08:00

A few hours before take off

As much as I don’t wanna leave but I still need to! I don’t want to go!! Haha today seems short because I kept keeping track of the time. Here are some stuffs u wanna read about what I will be doing in Brunei. And pictures of where I will be sleeping too! =)

Some infos

http://forums.hardwarezone.com/showthread.php?t=1266949

With pic

http://forums.hardwarezone.com/showthread.php?t=1266949&page=2&pp=15

http://xinox.no-ip.com/james/index.php?ayear=2005&amon=4

its 3.50 nw. gonna eat my early dinner now haha! Then a meal with the cell later. I will be back on 9^th!!!! Pray for me too! Hehe till we meet again! =D

God teach me to lean on YOU even even more!

2006-04-19T15:56:00.000+08:00

God teach me to lean on YOU even even more!

Tomorrow will be my oversea trip to Brunei where I will have one of my toughest training in my life in SAF! Much as long and tired it may be. I am still quite excited. There is just so much things in Singapore I cant bear to leave for even 3 weeks.. family.. church.. There is much to look forward to in Singapore. My family will be shifting to new house on 29^th this month. YEP I will be coming home in style, new house new room!

I really wish to stay back in Singapore. Cell group has just be formed and I need to go for some time. I wanna be in the cell! Hehe. Tho I am far but I will still pray for everyone of you not just cell but everyone! Because I cant think of anybody else hehe. For u people are not in Singapore but in my heart! mushy huh haha.. But brothers and sisters, pray for me too! Because the area I am going is quite a spiritual place as what I was told of. =)

I am sure I am going to get homesick even by the first week. But no matter where I am Jesus will be there =) Even as I am leaving for the trip. People around me seems more worried than I am hehe. But I know that’s love and that will be keeping me warm for a long time. thanks pple! =)

God Bless!

uncle

2006-03-20T19:02:00.000+08:00

uncle

This few days this thought have been on my mind. Why am I called uncle? Dun get me wrong. I am not complaining =)

Its funny how things turns out. I was called uncle lum when I was in sec 1! I have no idea why. Then again, my poly friends called me that too! Surprisingly I did not tell either of them I had the nick before. Then when I came to church, they called me uncle too!

I really don’t mind they calling me that. Now I want to be a uncle a loving and caring one. Someone friendly who people can approach without being shy. I want to be the uncle God wants me to be!! =P God will be the author of my life.

Life is good with God

thank God

2006-03-11T00:16:00.000+08:00

Praise You in this storm

Its is so hurting.. its like a knife piercing into my left hip area. And I cough and sneeze every other time. It’s the worst pain I ever felt. I don’t want this pain anymore. Its hurts seems like forever.

I cant walk properly for the first few days. Was bound by the chair or my bed. Kept telling myself that God is in control but the pain is so excruciating that at some point in times that’s like a voice telling you to give up. And I got to know that I will be a signaler which I have to carry extra equipments than others. And also riding the bike. My father has been gambling again and lost $1000++ . Storm is here and my strength is almost gone.

But things changed.

It was then I was reminded of my family. Support came in. Help came in. It is when u r hurting the most that you really wholehearted appreciate that your Christian family is always there for you. Not that I dun appreciate them in the past.. it’s just at a different level. The sms and words does not worth much. But the warmth and the person behind it does. Its priceless. I was really moved to tears as I read thru the smses.

Brothers and sisters.. thanks for being there. Don’t think I can get past w/o u guys support, care and love. =) Thank you auntie, vin,boonping,morris,colin, quoyi, the little sisters and all of you.. I love you guys! I just wanna hug u pple now

Lord I know I can trust You in control of my life. Thank you for the people You placed in my life. Thru this situation You placed in my life I have found new strength. Though it may hurt but I can go thru it as long as I have You God!. I will praise You in this storm.

Just wanna say this

2006-02-23T21:04:00.000+08:00

I love God =)

=)

2006-02-16T21:56:00.000+08:00

got a call from SPH today telling me i won a handphone worth $650! and it is not even in singapore yet! Praise God! Remembered that God said He will provide if i give up the mp3s! now i can get many albums! =) thank God

a day with rashes

2006-02-14T21:14:00.000+08:00

Rashes day

Had rashes yesterday out of the blue in the morning while I was in camp in eunos. It was quite serious, my whole face was red with rashes and feeling itchy everywhere! Everyone asked me what happened with a really serious face, I wasn’t much worried at first. But seeing their face made me think twice.

I pray for recovery. And guess what! My rashes were gone when I did not realized it! My friends asked me how did you recover so fast? What did you do? I repiled with a smile “I prayed”

Training ahead

2006-02-03T22:35:00.000+08:00

Training Ahead

Just know about my training plan. after this tiring 1 mth of bike course. i will be going overseas to Taiwan for training. then not long after i come back..i will be in Brunei for a month for another training. After which will another course for 2 weeks. it seems like a challenge.. a challenge.. mentally, physically, spiritually.

Today one of my good buddy have to drop out of the course for some reason. While walking with him to the bus, no words came out. I know how he felt. the disappointment in his eyes. we just walked.

Uncle is a happy man!

2006-01-31T16:19:00.000+08:00

oh yea.. i tot i shld give up on games too =) all games removed!! now my computer is really empty haha! you know...i nv know giving up something u like doing can be so much fun and the great feeling..=P i have seen the improvements in my life so much tho it is only since 3 days from my giving up of all these leisures. well..i am sure i did not make the wrong choice. now i gonna sell the desktop away dun need it anymore. Just God, bible , me

Uncle is a happy man!!

Trust and Obey

2006-01-29T21:04:00.000+08:00

Remove those movies those anime, those songs(Christian). And stop reading comics and watching anime movie and these songs. It was a calling.

These words are placed inside my heart from God when I was in snl last sat. Incase you don’t know, I love anime, comic and movies and of coz listening to Christian songs. They are my hobbies, things I do at home. They are like food to an ant, you cant really do without ‘em. It may seems trival to some, but it mean a whole lot to me. I love to dl stuffs.

It's taking too much of my time. far too much really...

I replied “yes” ”yes”. But when I reach home, I did not remove ‘em. I tot..maybe it’s just me(I know it’s from God, but I just wanted to hold on to them.) then came the service in the morning on CNY.

God spoke to me again. Remove them. I replied “then what entertainment can I have?” “what about the songs?(I am learning guitar in camp, I need them) and I also like to listen to Christian songs”

I will provide…

This 3 words meant a lot. Then i realized that actually it is not about fun and entertainment. It is about trusting and obedience. At that point, I kneeled and surrendered all of these to Him at the little corner at the back of the hall. I came home, I removed all, and I meant any trace off my computer. Be it website or movies or mp3. from my handphone, from my mp3 player.

Now how do I feel? GREAT! This feeling is just real good, I can see that God is already starting to give me something priceless, something you cant see but can feel. I gonna go down the store and get some albums =) A blessed year indeed.

=)

2006-01-02T17:19:00.000+08:00

A wonderful year indeed =) and also 1 year being a Christian. I guess if I want to write all the wonderful and sweet moments now, it gonna take quite some time =) But what beats everything is accepting God. There is no other more precious moment than this. He has change my life so very much. For the good. He has brought everything to me. The strength I needed, I peace I sought after.. everything I ever need. The brothers, the sisters He brought to my life. What more can I ask? =) I cant imagine myself without God. I know all the impact God has on my life all this while, I want more =)

My new year resolution?i have only 3.. To love, to Delicate, to work on it.

To Love. 1 Cor 13 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

If u sub the words with my name.. zhong hua is patient, zhong hua is kind. zhong hua does not…. Wait!! No I am none of this. zhong hua is not patient . but try substituting it with Jesus.

Jesus is patient, Jesus is kind. Jesus does not…. Yes.. that’s right! To be more Christ-like is to Love.

And to Love others loved and unloved. Yes I love my brothers and sisters. But I want to love them even more. =)

To delicate myself to God. Sound simple and short but to really delicate is to delicate wholeheartedly with soul and mind. With pure intentions. It gonna be hard but I am going to do it. Who cares if it is hard, I have God =)

What is words without actions. Even though I am listing them out, I will work on it. I am determined.

As long as God is with me, i will go any distance.

Yi Camp

2005-12-18T22:50:00.000+08:00

Yi Camp

Its not worth the price. The camp is priceless, that’s what I meant =) Packed with wonderful and life changing sermons, fun Games, interactions, bonding, encouragements. So much of it! The sermons was a hit on me and I learnt so much thru it. Had a break thru in the camp! Many more to come!! =)

And I love my Gideon team 3!! wHoo! Champions! My team consists of gerogina, laypeng, suet lin, qianyi, sherrie, shi min, xavier,yi kai, victor, guo yi and Christ. They are wonderful! Esp the sharing. I am so glad that they are willing to open up their heart and share with the team. I am sure we enjoyed the games! At the last nite they share with me so much I nearly cry! I am really very touched! And I din know the little things I did during the camp can become a encouragements to others! But seriously I feel that I learnt more then what I taught! Haha! Thank God! =)

In a few hours time I will be booking to a new camp. It sure is tough but I am sure I can live thru it because I have Jesus! And a group of faithful prayer warriors and princess! !

And I noticed God always cheer me on before I went for something that is tough for me. much to share! (talk more on the next blog) !

Down by the river!!

Say my name say MY NAME! GIDEON!!!!

Continue on this Path

2005-11-06T19:03:00.000+08:00

I am back! i will continue blogging! i wanted to stop blogging becuase of the pre-field camp feeling haha.. now i wan a change of blog skin!!! next week hehe.. here i am 2 hours from book in time with a heart which cant wait to book out again! haha! try to add some songs to nissi blog but seems like i messed up something but i don't have the time now to solve! sorry!

Bad news! going for a SIT test next week! which means 3 days out in the jungle! ahh! i hate field camp! but i will be able to pull thru! what is field camp when you have God! (haha this is from lynn, thanks lyn! i always use this to remind myself during hard times in camp. It never fails to refresh me =) ) And now even christians are beginning to scold vulgar in camp..hmm not very good but i am not at all influnce tho and it seems everyone doesn't do their quiet time anymore..

Next week is my NAFA(Ippt), hope i will get a gold(i doubt) ! haha! i wanna break the 8.30mins barrier for 2.4km so i can enjoy a mac meal from my sir who promise to treat if i get 8.30! haha! be prepared!

Ah..so much to share..but not much time now..need to go book in!
Oh Lord!Thank you Lord for all the wonderful things you said to me this week..Lord please remind my brothers and sisters to spend their time wisely! Thank You Lord! In Jesus name i pray. AMEN!

First Blog after Ns

2005-10-09T10:57:00.000+08:00

First Blog after Ns

I did not have time to blog after both of my previous book out. But here I am now C=

Many things happened in camp. Both good and bad. I used to think I can be able to continue to grow spiritually even when I am in army. But somehow it doesn’t seem so. There is a period which I am too tired to do quiet time everyday. And before I know it, I realized i am off focus of God. Felt no presence of God. Nothing seems to going right. In addition to that, I felt no meaning of serving in the army. It is then I am starting to feel like a lifeless dummy that is uncertain of the future. I am not ready for all this, I went in the army not prepared enough. And last week, my mp3 player got “lost”, I use it for listening to Christian songs but now its gone. The feeling is dreadful when everything crashes in at the same time.

It was when I am marching and singing that I came back to focus on God. The song reminded me what I am and why I am doing in the army, to protect my loved ones and the country. I started to think about the feelings of the soldiers in the bible and what are they fighting for. I know this is from God. Just felt so re-energized! Like the Duracell rabbit!

One of my friend Nixon have high fever 38.3 for two days and he is unwilling to see a doctor because we have a test the next day and he doesn’t want to miss it. I was surprised when he asked if I can pray for him. And so I did. And guess what? He recovered the next day without taking in any pills. Praise the Lord! =)

The day after I lost my player, i feel like I will gain something even more precious but I have no idea what it is. It was during the pnw in church that I began to know what God have for me to know what I have gained. I can still praise and worship Him with my voice and my heart and not need a mp3, I know this will please Him C=

One of my bunk mate start to talk about harry potter, so I started to share with what I know about it and we slowly started to talk about Christianity and God =) what surprised me was another one of my bunkmates came over and say he is interested in our conversation and 1 more and soon I am sharing with 7 of my bunk mates! And 2 of them are Indian and Malay mixed! Then they started to bomb me with questions and doubts but I like being bombed! hahas

Thank Lord for all that He have done. Even though I faced much through this storm, He is always with me =) Now I felt stronger than ever, now I am ready for any storm because the Lord is always with me through it all ! =) I really learnt much thru this experience. And many thanks for all the messages and presents that you sisters and brothers gave! =) I am loved =) Really appreciated it! Now I dun bear to drink the honey drink and the chocs and duck because they are so sweet! I mean really sweet! =) Nissi Rox!

Left, Left, Left Right

2005-09-07T22:52:00.000+08:00

Now is 10.40 and in 9 hours and 20 mins I will be falling in at Tekong. Thanks so much for the messages by you people, some of you are really funny haha. Nissione rox! =P Now is only wed and I am already beginning to miss you pple and sat. ok today I must sleep early, have to report at 8.30am tmr morning. Feeling really happy today =)

Hope my sun burn will be healed tml! =) can sms me at night if u wanna! =P Munching on my last packet of M&M now..*crunch*

Take kare pple! God Bless!

yawns

2005-08-27T08:44:00.000+08:00

Ring Ring …

The phone rings… it did not come at a good time, it was 4.40 in the morning. The phone is too loud to ignore, so I picked it up while thinking how to scold the caller for the next moment. “This is the Singtel Announcement service, you have one message in your..” I hung up.. I couldn’t scold a computer operator I thought.

Here comes a second surprise. I dreamt that I am the Praise and worship leader and did not prepare anything yet and it was only a few minutes before the starting of the cell group. Then I saw Lynn and Wan Ping walking towards me, Uh oh… But I am glad the dream end here.. haha! I cannot imagine the next scene..

I brought five books and a bible last week. I a few in one go so I need not go bookstore for some time again =) But it was a burn in my pocket. Damage done = $100+ but plus a satisfied soul..

For a recap on birthday, I got a brand new bag.. a self drawn T-Shirt =), cards and a card form aus! ^^, smssss, and also a call from my friend in Australia, she stayed up till 2 plus just to give me a call! Feel so bad =P But I like all of them thanks guys! And girls! And Aunties and uncle!(have to put a special section for them =P )

gonna do some shopping b4 going cell.. Go GO!

Bloggin(i couldn't think of a title)

2005-08-24T23:31:00.000+08:00

If you might be thinking why did zhonghua not blog for so long? Especially after his birthday? True I have lots to blog. But I got so interested in Noah ark, the flood, dinosaurs, Darwin theory, Big Bang, evolution. I just read about it day and night. Just couldn’t learn enough! There are so many facts supporting the flood! Is there really dinosaurs, and did they died millions of years ago like what the evolutionists think? Why did adam lived up to 900+ years old while our generation has a average lifespan of 70-80? Did dinosaurs really go extinct? Did the flood create the Grand Canyon (with facts supporting this)? And truths behind the big bang theory and evolution. But does everyone know about this? I believe as a Christian I should be at least ready to answer if a non Christian asks. I was dumbfounded when I was asked by one of my friend regarding to dinosaurs and I wouldn’t want that to happen again.

I was quite saddened by some stuff this few weeks and made someone disappointed which I did not meant to. Hasn’t been liked myself these days. But my faith is not shaken! =) Signing off..

Sacrifice

2005-08-08T22:53:00.000+08:00

I love comics. I seldom watch television so I spend much time on comic alone. Just like I gave up anime a few weeks back. Now I am giving comics up too. But I see it more significant to me now. I see it as a sacrifice, a living sacrifice. I read comic and anime more than I use my cellphone. It is something I love doing but it is taking too much time. It came to me that I spend more time on comic books than the bible. It is my desire to have greater faith, I should be devoting my time for Him and His Words; reading, learning, believing it and not some comic book.

Change has to start with me, my attitude towards Him. Time is something God has given us but most of us don’t use it wisely. But now I hand it up as a sacrifice to God! And God has already blessed me so very much from the start of today! I felt so much closer to Him than before. Things starts to come into light, I started to see things I never did before. I am so excited now! Why? Because THIS IS ONLY THE START!

Even at this start, I had already begun to see how God has changed me. Although through my walk in Christ, there is so much more blessing but there will be trials as well. But I will face them with strength because I have God who strengthen my thru my weakness! Problems force us to focus more on God, draw closer to others in fellowship, work on building character and give us a testimony. In other words, contained in every problem is an opportunity to become more Christ-like! God has so much installed for me! cool!

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jer 29:11

He loves us more than we love ourselves

2005-08-07T23:24:00.000+08:00

We went plaza singapura to celebrate miao xia and Jack birthday today. We watch a Korea show “my brother”. It is a simple story with much deep feelings and meaning. It is quite a touching story, but I don’t like watching movies like this in cinema because it feel strange to cry =P ( I will wept if I watch touching stories =) ). The story is about 2 brothers taking care of each other when the elder brother contacted cancer. And his parents tried so hard to get him healed. And a Tarzan that knows how to fly. And you know the rest =)

It came to me that actually, we (both Christians and non) are very much like the brothers in the show. And the parent is God. We often got hurt but we kept having a perception that God doesn’t understand the pain we are suffering, and sometimes some of us choose to blame Him. But when we are hurt and suffering, it is hurting Christ more than it is to us. He knows that we are hurting, but do we know that He is crying out for us? Appreciate His love? It is also in this situation that we are able to grow and be closer to God.

He loves us as a God, a friend and a Father. He loves us more than anyone. He loves us more than we love ourselves.

"Some things are loved because they are worthy, some things are worthy because they are loved"

Grasping for air

2005-07-31T21:34:00.000+08:00

I woke in shocked as I heard a faint voice calling out to me. It was my mum. I know something is not right. I rushed to the toilet to see my mum pale face. My mum will leave the toilet door open by a little in case when she has stomach upset and feel like fainting. I stumbled myself searching around for med for my mum. My mum had fainted in the past and was sent to the hospital, I wouldn’t want that again. As she walked out of the toilet, she fainted right on me. Her body fell on me, I felt my heart just stopped for that moment. I woke my brother as I shouted to wake him up. No time to waste, 995 was the right decision.

I placed her on the bed. She is half conscious with eyes half open, she said in a faint voice to ask me not to call for an ambulance. But her eyes started to close. I shouted to her. No response. I know I am losing her. I cry out to God desperately, it was like grasping for air knowing the moment u stop grasping, it will result in death. I prayed for help, deep from the heart. As short as it is, it meant everything to me at that moment.

In a short moment, I know my prayer was answered. I can feel her fingers gripping on mine and she opened her eyes. Amen! But she was still kinda of unstable, I asked my brother to look after her. And I retreated back to my room, I pray, speaking in tongue. I prayed for healing! The next moment, my mum is able to stand without support and walk around! It’s the healing of God, I know it! After that, the doctor said that it is due to food poisoning and low blood pressure. I will keep praying.

I felt that God gave me a lesson this incident. I was so desperate for God and the deep heart-felted prayer i pray at that time. Then why can’t I be desperate for God and knowledge as if I am grasping for air =)

God is Awesome and prayers always do miracles. Amen! =)

Giving up for God

2005-07-29T10:51:00.000+08:00

Today I give up my love for anime. I am a great fan of anime for who will spend more than 30mins searching for anime to download and watch. And I will spend at least 2 hours daily. I am addicted. Since it is in serial and it comes out weekly and I have so many anime to watch. But I found myself spending too much time on watching anime. Why did I not choose to watch just an episode a day, a healthy amount? The answer is I couldn’t control myself, to take away something; I rather eliminate it from the roots.

I had spend so much time on anime but why did I not rather spend them by reading God’s word, fellowshipping, praying and encouraging fellow Christians.

Putting down something you had been doing for 8 years isn’t that easy but I want to dedicate my time to God. It is the purpose in the things that we do in our life that can make us be fulfilling to the purpose GOd has put into our life. I believe this is a step God wants me to take to walking this Christian life. Sometimes we spend so much time doing something we feel is right but isn’t that right after all.

Spending excessive time for pleasure (anime) = meaningless

Spending time with God = Priceless and wonderfull =)

Lord, I am sorry for the time I spend in worldly things rather than reading your Word. I pray that I will become stronger for You day by day in the little steps I take. And I pray for all the fellow brothers and sisters, Lord you will remind them of their wrong habits they are having now and spending time on meaningless things in this period of time. And that they will dedicate their time to You Lord in all things we do! In Jesus name i pray. Amen

Sharing in Town

2005-07-27T22:42:00.000+08:00

Today went sharing with Leo and Roy with aunty Lynn at town, cool huh? While waiting for both of them to come. We saw a blind man in the mrt station, but something caught our eyes. The blind man was wearing a cap with words “Walk by faith and not by sight” Although people might think that he cant walk by sight because he is blind, but without believing from our heart and trust in God how can we walk by faith. Maybe its God plans of reminding me =)

Leo is 16 while Roy is 15, they are best of friends. As we spend our afternoon, i think we asked more questions than they did =P they reside in Sheng Zheng which is not facing as much prosecution as the rest of China. They have a legal church in their area which is good news =) But it seems that both of them are the only ones who is Christians in the circle of friends they have. They are going back in a few weeks time so we must share with them as much as possible so they can bring more people to Christ and strong in faith! =) A note to students: they do their homework for 8 hrs everyday not including school hours. Think about that! To think pple complain =P

Mass street e is coming! So excited but since my grandpa birthday is on sat, I cant make it for SNL =( it feel so….er.. I just cant find a word to describe.. Just so uneasy and upset to miss a service. Can’t imagine I will not be able to come for 2-3 weeks when I enter army initially.>.<>

Highlight in BOLD those that you did before!

2005-07-19T14:49:00.000+08:00

was asked to do this set of questions.. quite interesting stuffs about me.. =)

x smoked a cigarette
x smoked a cigar
x been in love
x been dumped
x shoplifted
x been fired
x been in a fist fight (once)
x snuck out of parent's house
x had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back
x been arrested
x made out with a stranger
x gone on a blind date
x lied to a friend (Sorry guys)
x had a crush on a teacher
x skipped school (uh-oh)
x seen someone die (yes I did..)
x been overseas
x been on a plane
x thrown up in a bar
x set a part of myself on fire
x eaten sushi
x gone crazy at a concert
x love someone or miss someone right now (Someone)
x laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by (I wanna do this again ^_^)
x made a snow angel
x had a tea party
x flown a kite ( I know how to make 1 too!)
x built a sand castle
x gone puddle jumping (HEHE!)
x played dress up
x jumped into a pile of leaves
x gone sledding
x cheated while playing a game
x been lonely (Not anymore after I found God!)
x fallen asleep at work/school (VERY OFTEN)
x used a fake id
x watched the sun set (on a mountain @ m’sia)
x felt an earthquake
x touched a snake
x been tickled
x been robbed
x been kidnapped (NEARLY!)
x been misunderstood
x won a contest
x ran a red light
x been suspended from school
x been in a car accident
x had braces
x felt like an outcast
x eaten a whole tub of ice cream in one night (2 lt =x)
x had deja vu
x danced in the moonlight ( pleasant memories ^_^ )
x hated the way you look
x witnessed a crime
x questioned your heart
x been obsessed with post-it notes
x squished whole body through the mud ( YES and in DITRY MUD!)
x been lost (in the past, but not anymore!)
x been to the opposite side of the country
x swam in the ocean
x felt like dying
x cried yourself to sleep
x played cops and robbers
x recently colored with crayons/colored pencils/markers
x sung karaoke
x paid for a meal with only coins
x done something you told yourself you wouldn't (that I will create a blog =p)
x made prank phone calls (on April fool)
x laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
x caught a snowflake on your tongue
x danced in the rain (I love this)
x written a letter to Santa Claus (Primary school, but with no address >.<)
x been kissed under the mistletoe
x watched the sun set with someone you care about
x blown bubbles
x made a bonfire on the beach ( I love this )
x crashed a party
x gone roller-skating (1^st and last time ! Haha!)
x had a wish come true ( have prayers come true! =))
x worn pearls
x jumped off a bridge
x ate dog/cat food (dog crackers, I DIN KNOW!)
x told a complete stranger you loved them
x kissed a mirror (hahaha.. ya... its true... its kinda funny once you think of it)
x sang in the shower
x have a black dress ( Is this for females only? )
x had a dream that you married someone
x glued your hand to something (both hands together)
x got your tongue stuck to a something metal
x kissed a fish
x worn the opposite sexes clothes (I WAS FORCED!)
x been a cheerleader
x sat on a roof top (in school..shhh..)
x screamed/shouted at the top of your lungs
x done a one-handed cartwheel
x talked on the phone for more than 5 hours ( I did from 9pm – 7am next day, 10hrs!)
x stayed up all night
x didn't take a shower for a week (ops, during camp!)
x pick and ate an apple right off the tree
x climbed a tree
x had a tree house/club house
x are scared to watch scary movies alone (er..ya haha)
x believe in ghosts
x have more then 30 pairs of shoes
x worn a really ugly outfit just to see what others say (want me to show u? =p)
x gone streaking
x played chicken
x been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on (pushed and thrown!)
x been told you're hot by a complete stranger
x caught a fish then ate it
x caught a butterfly
x laughed so hard you cried
x cried so hard you laughed

x Cry while watching shows
x cheated on a test (primary school)
x have a Britney Spears CD
x forgotten someone's name (very often..)

The walk home

2005-07-13T23:48:00.000+08:00

After the sending xiao meimei home after meeting. i decided to walk home. i like to stroll when i am feeling troubled, feeling down, many questions on my mind or just want to be alone with God. It was a long walk home but i still walk the walk

I pray for answers. As i walked i talk to God. All the problems i am facing, all that is troubling me. It is only between God and me. On the path, i saw the barbwire on the fence of a school. i began to think about Jesus and the crown of thorns. He was nailed to the cross, for us. His scars are for us, His blood is for us on that very cross. it was all so true...God loves me more then i love myself... if i know i will be going to heaven, why should i let the problems of this world bother me? If Jesus is in my shoes, what will He think?

As i walked thru some flags sticking to the grass patch beside my path, one of the flag are lying in the middle of the road. i always believe if i sees something undone, it is God's way of telling us to finish the job. but i walked over the flag instead of doing something to it. after a distance, i can feel God's prompting me "if I am in your shoes, what will I do?" it was kinda funny, but i walked back and place the flag on one side nicely. it felt good =) real good although it is a simple task.

God loves me more than i love myself. But how many times have i broken His heart, but still He forgive... And all the prayers i prayed, He is always there faithfully to answer them, and those He did not answer, i know He has another plan for me. And whenever i am feeling down, He will be here to comfort. Knowing Him more everyday is my greatest reward. Thank you Lord.

The Road of Life
At first I saw God as my observer, my judge
keeping track of the things I did wrong,
so as to know whether I merited heaven or hell when I die.
He was out there sort of like a president.
I recognized His picture when I saw it,
But I didn't really know Him.

But later on, when I met Christ,
it seemed as though life were rather like a bike ride,
but it was a tandem bike,
and I noticed that Christ was in the back helping me pedal.

I don't know just when it was
that He suggested that we change places,
but life has not been the same since.

When I had control, I knew the way.
It was rather boring, but predictable...
It was the shortest distance between two points.

But when He took the lead,
He knew delightful long cuts,
up mountains, and through rock places at breakneck speeds,
it was all I could do to hang on!
Even though it looked like madness,
He said, "Pedal!"

I was worried and anxious and asked,
"Where are you taking me?"
He laughed and didn't answer,
and I started to learn to trust.

I forgot my boring life
and entered into the adventure
And when I'd say, "I'm scared,"
He'd lean back and touch my hand.

He took me to people with gifts that I needed,
gifts of healing, acceptance, and joy.
They gave me gifts to take on my journey.
My Lord's and mine.

And we were off again.
He said, "Give the gifts away;
they're extra baggage, too much weight."
So I did, to the people we met,
and I found that in giving I received,
and still our burden was light.

I did not trust Him at first,
in control of my life.
I thought He'd wreck it;
But He knows the bike secrets,
knows how to make it bend to take sharp corners,
knows how to jump to clear high rocks,
knows how to fly to shorten scary passages.

And I am learning to shut up and pedal in the strangest places,
and I'm beginning to enjoy the view and the cool breeze on my face
with my delightful companion, Jesus Christ. And when I'm sure that I just can't do anymore
He just smiles and says..."Pedal."

Sat

2005-07-09T23:04:00.000+08:00

i cant think well this days.. have not sort out my thoughts yet.. so many mixed feelings and thoughts right now. kinda sick of it. but i will continue seeking God for help.

Today i am the ice breaker! i dun think i did very well for the game but hope everyone enjoys it! =) i am glad that some of the cell members say they like my games in the past and now ^____^
Only today then i know the honeydrew cost $2. i ordered 2 cups..$4 >.< makes my heart ache as it is a small cup.

not much to write today, have not sort my thoughts yet.

If we are the body of Christ

2005-07-07T15:49:00.000+08:00

It's crowded in worship today
As she slips in trying to fade into the faces
The girls teasing laughter is carrying farther than they know
Farther than they know

But if we are the body
Why aren't His arms reaching?
Why aren't His hands healing?
Why aren't His words teaching?
And if we are the body
Why aren't His feet going?
Why is His love not showing them there is a way?
There is a way

A traveler is far away from home
He sheds his coat and quietly sinks into the back row
The weight of their judgmental glances
Tells him that his chances are better out on the road

Jesus paid much too high a price
For us to pick and choose who should come

And we are the body of Christ
But if we are the body
Why aren't His arms reaching?
Why aren't His hands healing?
Why aren't His words teaching?
And if we are the body
Why aren't His feet going?
Why is His love not showing them there is a way?
Jesus is the way

------------------------------------------------
I want to share this song with everyone. This song explained my feelings for the Christians around me recently. No one in particular. But I admit sometimes i judge people and my words not teaching and my feet not going and all the rest the song has stated.

Many times I seen fellow brothers and sisters not teaching and reaching and it pains me to see that if we don’t move who will come! I have friends whom I don’t even know that they are Christian for 3 years! Are the people living in this world now rather be ashamed of the world’s eyes than BE ASHAMED OF SHARING OF THE GOSPEL? I may be very blunt and offending to some people by the things I just said. i may just be just a baby Christian, i may be weak BUT MY HEART WILL BE STRONG! I MAY BE SMALL BUT MY PRAYERS WILL BE BIG!

Ponder the power of the gospel to bring forgiven sinners to final, everlasting joy. Nothing in the world can do this except the gospel of Jesus Christ. On the day when you stand in front of the Lord. Would you want Him to praise you for the things you did in this world or be ashamed of you?

Jesus is the way

Strong girl

2005-07-06T13:47:00.000+08:00

I talked to a strong person. She has many problems and bad experiences in the family and, in school and with friends. Her experiences are not something many can imagine or had come across. She even has the thoughts of committing suicide in the past. This girl has fall so many times on this path to heaven. But she got up again and again but fearing that the next fall will be something she can’t stand up to. All this while, she was clinging on to her faith for God. She knows that God is here with her and will bring her thru. For the non-Christians you might be thinking, why she is still suffering after so much praying and suffering as a Christian. We are weak, that’s why we need God to strengthen us.
My heart breaks, seeing her suffering so much in the past and now. She was more than a sister; we are the body of Christ. I couldn’t write much, all this experience, feelings and thoughts I am having now is not something words can express.

People always consider that their troubles are terrible and seem to be experiencing the worst situation compared to others. i feel ashamed to even compare.

But I really want her to know that even now that she fall in the future; God will be here with her till the end of times. God has made it such that there is never a night without a morning and there will always be sunshine after the rain. And we will always be here for u to support you in these times of trials and share your burdens. We will pray.. take care and stay strong sister!..

Whatever your cross
Whatever your pain
There will always be sunshine
after the rain

Perhaps you might stumble
Perhaps you might fall
But God’s always here
To help you through it all

Funny moments for the week

2005-07-04T23:31:00.000+08:00

- Got called up stage to dance Marvelous light( the part with hands and spin around) with miao ling and zhen wei and 4 other church bros and sis! 1st time on stage..er..Jumping haha

- Got sprayed by a running hose spraying loose!

- Got drenched partly by a container filled with some water when i am trying to place it on top of the selves

- Went out with someone and got mistaken by friends as a couple

- Ronnie only wanted to get a $2 d24 durian but ended by buying 3 D24 for $10. The good news is its cheap, bad news? He has sore throat and coughing. Ouch

there’s more but i can’t remember =P

Mixed

2005-07-03T20:01:00.000+08:00

i received some concern sms asking if i am aright as i am sick. Thank you bros and sisters so much! =) i was quite shocked when i received the sms as i am sure i did not tell them about it. i found out later that there was a call chain to pray for my sickness! Thanks to lynn!(did not ask about it but should be shepherd =) ) i always have the thinking that prayer call chain is pass on only when the person ask for it. Learnt something new though its kind of silly for me to think this way haha. Today is cafe duty with aspiration, it was tiring but fun =) and thanks Clarice for the 2 honey drinks! it helped a lot! =) i seldom fall sick but i keep falling sick on important days on conference and cafe duty. i guess i did not rest enough and did not regularly exercise like what i did in the past.

On the alter yesterday, i felt that God has showed me that a simple day to day caring for my family can bring them to Him. I never said "i love you" to my parents before ever since i grown up. did not really spend much time with them this few months. i am going to reach out to them day by day, step by step, bit by bit. Just like pastor daniel's father who pray for his grandma everyday in the morning without fail and this touched his grandma heart and she accepted Jesus into her life! Awesome!

But what bother me is that i feel that some people may get intimidated or irritated when I send them too much msg/sms or rather much a nuisance to them. Not messages of nonsense but to let them know that God is here and know that i am praying for them and they are not forgotten. i will still be praying for them but i guess i should not keep sending msg/sms. Hope no one mind

Street Evangelism

2005-07-02T08:50:00.000+08:00

Later on i will be leading the praise and worship. i have prepared myself, but i cant seem to complete a song without coughing. This is my first time leading the praise and worship and i don't want to miss it. But i do believe God will walk me thru the session without coughing :)

Yesterday we did Street Evangelism at bukit batok. Lynn the shepherd, miao ling, zhenwei, da wanling, daniel and me of coz =) no soul has been saved but we found people who are interested! and we will follow up on them. we have lynn pairing with miao ling, wanling with daniel and zhenwei with me. we started at about 3. It was quite hard to speak at first since we stumble on our words when we are sharing with he first guy. but we got better after that =) sharing has never been so easy! she is really a good speaker! She speaks so fluent and smooth! There was a point when i share to a group of 8 people, but we managed to find the courage to speak without fear even to so many people! and the white and black plate thingy haha!(not many pple knows this) but what sad is wanling lost her hand phone and is unable to retrieve it... i hope she and her parents will get over it. Someone may not be able to come cell because of her parent objection. My parents were once like this so i know how she feels very well. Pray that her parents will open up their heart and see how much she has changed! And how much she wants to go to church! Amen

There is many things happening to the people around me now. i pray for them, but i want to be able to help them too. Like parents matter (quarrels, not letting bros and sis to church), army, emotion and other matters. These sis and bros need our encouragements and people to talk to. To find the strength to carry our own burden, we must first carry other people’s burden. I will be able to carry burdens no matter how heavy they are for others because I know that the Lord will be supporting me and always be at my side.

Influential & easily Influenced

2005-06-30T19:01:00.000+08:00

Most of my friends said that i am both influential and easily influenced in respect to mood. I was told that when i smile or laugh or kid around, it makes them feel cheerful and welcomed. And especially when i smile, they can’t see my eyes (one of the jokes they made on me haha). I am not sure of this of me being influential to people but i am glad if I can be of such a help to make them feel happy =)

Easily influenced? Yes I will say so but only if it is in relation to happy mood. When the group or friends around me are feeling happy and cheerful, I will be just as content. I love to see others feeling cheerful and happy especially when they smile, it just melts my heart. U can’t really describe this feeling; let’s just say it is a joy to see others being happy and smiling. But if someone beside me is feeling down and sad, i will not follow on. Because I believe that if the atmosphere is gloomy and down, the more i should stay positive and cheerful. We have to encourage the people and not feeling down along with them!

The English structure for this blog is kind of strange for me, tho I am the one who wrote it. But I still like the way it is. Simple but strange

today da wan ling saw me and jack at the bus stop! well i certainly did not see her on the bus because i normally don't notice my environment haha.. but it is quite fun and funny that u r waving and there is no repiles haha.. i love strange meetings haha.. i believe it is God's way of reminding us that we still have our friends and family of christ!

beeP Beep

2005-06-30T12:58:00.000+08:00

Been coughing like nothing today, hope i get well by sat because i will be leading the priase and worship. Many new comers will be present, i must do my best for Him and them! I watched War of the Worlds with some of the cell family members on wed. to celerbrate miao ling end of tests? kinda haha. we have lots of fun! after that we went to Lynn's house to see her dog. her dog likes to lie on the floor flat! so lazy! haha he got so hype up(kinda) when i lie on floor following his pattern. then for about 10 mins the sugar chong(the dog) rest on elvin lap which i hope sugar will pee on elvin =X after that we walk the dog haha! thats all! now i gonna go stock up with jack and wanping for the cafe! a day of shopping! anyway the title has nothing to do with the blog haha! just that i have no brains to think about a title =P

Studies Warriors

2005-06-28T23:23:00.000+08:00

Most of the Jc's students like WeiYang, ZhenWei, Da WanLing, Jiemin should be preparing their exams/tests this few months. and of coz not forgetting the O students MiaoLing, YouXiong, XiaoWanLing. I chatted with some of them. It seems that life is quite stressful in JC, the promo in Jjc esp for ZhenWei. and test is coming and results may not be that wonderful. And with not much of sleep can cause u to get piss off easily and trying to stay awake during lectures .try to sleep early! u know who u r!! =P i feel so helpless to not able to help them in studying since i am not from jc. but i do earnestly pray for them and encouraging them, although that is the least i can do but God can do anything :) i pray that they will see studying as a joy and not just a stepping stone to higher level education. Time is essential but i also pray that they will manage their time so they will still do their quiet time. And also the strength to carry on.
and those studying for O study hard! i been thru Os, the hardest barrier is LAZYINESS! :) so study instead of slacking around. School is fun compare to work trust me on this =P

Stay strong :) u guys and girls are in my prayers! if anyone have any problems feel free to call me, i will be more than glad to be a listener =) readers pray for them too =)

Relationship

2005-06-27T23:09:00.000+08:00

There are so many cases of people hurting from love around me. i am like a love doctor, treating people :) not to be loved in return is painful for some people and for some is to love someone and never finds the courage to let the person know how you feel. This is painful since i experienced it myself.. you can never forget them effortlessly, its not an over night thingy. Always put yourself in other's shoes. If you feel that it hurts you, it probably does hurt the person too. Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one so that when we finally meet the right person, we should know how to be grateful for that gift. Healing and forgetting takes time, pray for strength to let it go. The more you try to forget it, it will just come back harder. Those who feel guilty liking someone, please don't. It was never wrong to fall in love. Remember God is with us even with the single hood :)

i do long for a relationship, but i know i am still “young” so i guess there are plenty of chances :) i just got over my own relationship problem. God doesn't give you such a strong desire for companionship just to torture you; it's there for a reason and it's completely natural. Some of us don't feel the need for a partner and that's fine -each to their own.

But what are the reasons you want to be with the person? Wanting him/her to fix u or make your life perfect is unrealistic. Let’s see it as to enhance your life and a great blessing :)

Personally, I would like my future partner/wife to love God more than me. God will be her first priory. i always believe people who put God first will love me so much more. Christian girls i know are all so wonderful and nice, i am not saying non-Christian girls are not as wonderful but there are still some differences. i love small kids a lot, haha I love to play with them. But i have no idea if they grow up. is this topic leading to marriage? haha :P

Conf

2005-06-27T19:55:00.000+08:00

I learnt much in the 4 days conference. one of it is how Christians in countries is living.
Christians in other countries is facing far more problems than us people in Singapore. Like in Indonesia, the government is implementing a law that stops any Christian’s activities as they want to be an Islam country. Most of them have financial problems to stay alive while we always feel we are in financial problems when we lack cash to purchase items like hand phone. Christians in other countries are crying out for their nation and this generation. are we crying for them too? Even a 6 year old child fasted for a day and cried for people that she sees. Are we people even too reluctant to fast even for a day in food paradise Singapore? We always say to do this and that, but we don't move. Now is the time to start moving. For the generation.

3rd day at Asia Oceania Youth Conference

2005-06-23T23:07:00.000+08:00

today is the 3rd day of the conference. i am aching from all the sitting. i am sick(fever,coughing,flu,sneezing(someone miss me =P), suffering a little lack of sleep. but all this is worth it. i have learn so many new things and learn more about listening to Him. i may be physically tired, but i am still so spiritually hungry. i still have much to learn, there is no end to what we can learn from God. People from all over asia come to learn from and worship the same God, isn't it wonderful? but seeing how they are doing for their countries, i feel that we youths in Singapore is not doing enough! there is so much i want to share with you sisters and brothers. but i am really too tried now, have to wake up early tml for conference. I really hope you can be here at night at the conference with us tml too. nights pple. i will share more tml! so much to share! God bless.

-------------------------------------

knowing You more everyday has become my great reward

Sick but filled

2005-06-20T21:06:00.000+08:00

It has been a sick day for me, i felt so weak and feverish suddenly while i am out with the cell bros and sis. i got a fever alright, i rest for the whole late afternoon and evening. i don't want to be sick, there is conference tomorrow! i am too excited to miss this four days conference. Please pray for me! But i feel better now. Good news

today is rather good despite the fever. i met the person who i lent the $15 ! i saw him walking in my direction but i try to avoid his view(i have no idea what am i thinking). Instead he saw me, and i was told that his wife was really searching for me! They tot i am in the power kids instead of youth group. Hey, i look young! :) After that i wanted to chat with him but he was hurrying so i remained. i look forward to meeting him again, his wife or his son, not because i desire the money back. I just wanted to know their names. it feels good to know more people.

I would like to learn Chinese and hokkien right from the start again. Words like grace, faith, salvation i would like to learn. Time is running out, i have to make a stand and reach out to my family and grandparents. any kind souls? :)

I was wearing a cap for the first 2 days of the soul relvolution conference. i couldn't feel much. i feel being blocked by something. I tot, it may be my cap. i did a prayer that He can show me what is the barrier. that fruitful night, i wanted to sleep right away but i felt a urge to read the bible. and i did. And i came aross a verse in the bible 1 cor 11:7 "A man should not wear anything on his head while worshipping, for man is God's glory..." for the 3rd day i did not wear a cap.

Fasting

2005-06-15T23:13:00.000+08:00

Today i fast, i did a computer fast. i will not touch the computer from 6 to 6. i have been sticking to the computer for a few months. Morning to night if i am at home. i feel a yearning to do a fast and so i did. i prayed and read His words. But my mom is at home, i can't let her see me with a bible. So i prayed that i can be alone in the house for the whole afternoon...and indeed! she went out for majong session at 12! praise the Lord! Filled with spirit and enthu i went on to reading the bible.

At about 3pm i went for a haircut. ON my way there, i met a stranger in his mid 40s. He asked for help (taxi fare) as his son is having a asthma attack and need to be sent to a family doctor quick. i passed him $15(tho its not much, but its the most i could give for the week) as he needed a taxi fare. Seriously i hesitated for a while as i thought, maybe this guy is a cheater, but i offered to him anyway. He claims that his wife is a chirstian in church of singapore (which is my church), and will return me the money in church but well...i dun intend to get the money back..as long as the money is use for the right purpose. Then he hurried down the road.

I did a prayer for him and his son. But i know there may be a chance that he is a cheater too. i prayed for forgivness. Many will think... how come this baka wants to pray for a cheater(if he is) !!?? but he needed the money..no matter what reason, he needed the money..its all that matter... i hope he will feel that every moment he is living now is of God grace, and he accept Him.
Romans 12:8 "If you have money, share it generously"

Blog

2005-06-14T12:41:00.000+08:00

Some people ask me " Why do u always blog about your life with God? Why do you keep talking about God? Why do you always relate things happening around to God, be it good or bad?"

i can't live a day without thinking of Him. i am always thinking of Him. I blog because i want to share my testimonial and my life with others. Some non-Christian friends may stop looking at my blog because it is about God, but if this blog can encourage or help even just one person, i am more than glad =)

It's so easy to get out of balance. One of the best ways to prevent it is to keep a Spiritual journal/blog. The discipline of writing down what God says to me, and what i learned along the way. This is not a diary of events, but a record of things i can't afford to forget.

Writing helps clarify what's really important in our life. Our life is a journey, and a journey deserves a journal. So, why don't we take a few moments each day and begin writing about the stages and challenges of our Spiritual journey? And don't just write about the good stuff.

Problems force us to focus more on God, draw closer to others in fellowship, work on building character and give us a testimony. In other words, contained in every problem is an opportunity to become more Christ-like!

In the middle of a difficult experience the Psalmist wrote, "Let this be recorded for future generations, so that a nation yet to be created will praise the Lord" (Ps 102:18 NIV). we pass on to people how God helped me overcome my problems and fulfill His purposes through my life. Think: what i write will be a witness that continues to speak long after i am in heaven!

Room in my heart

2005-06-12T22:43:00.000+08:00

Today sermon was great! i feel so refreshed, spirit filled. i felt God has answered my prayers.

i have been wrestling with problems in relationship this few week and i know there is still something i have not given up in my heart. i have not given up some earthly feelings which i should have given up. i pray for help and answers for my problems. I feel so troubled by it. And these days, 2 of my brother and sister have problems spiritually. They seem to be straying further away. Nothing I speak can touch their hardened heart. i can only pray for them, that God will break down this wall that is hindering their heart to Him. Maybe this is my first time i meet with this situation of someone in the road to backsliding, I don’t know how to handle it well. Maybe i can’t accept the fact that they know that God is real but they refuse to follow Him any longer. i feel gloomy even if it is a stranger and is backsliding. There will be a day when He will come down again as a King. It will be too late to repent then.

But now i feel back again! Cause God show to me again how to handle them! And i have open the doors of the all the rooms esp “secrets” and “Relationship”. I will never try to lock them up again. Someday I even want to have the door being break down! No longer will there be any door between me and my heavenly Father again! I hand everything to Him. My worries, my brothers and sisters, my family and my friends, everything, to the Lord i love... Thank You Lord.

Decision for Him

2005-06-10T00:34:00.000+08:00

Everyday, every moment we are making decisions. Be it a meal or an outing and going to church. These little decisions we made everyday may slowly turn into a habit which may make us stray away from Him.

X: yoyo wanna go out this Sat for a gathering for the whole 2002 batch?
Me: hmm…i would very much like to go but i have church service on Sat
X: Well, you can skip a service since u has gone for so many services. God will forgive you even if you do not go for a single service
Me: Hmm…let me think about it. I will confirm with you at a later date.

i was asked by some of my best friends to attend our last gathering. Lots of my old friends will be there too. i received this call some day before Sat which the church will be holding a special event – Amazing Race and a special talker. I really wanted to go for Amazing race since it is the first game that i will be playing in YI (my church). But I was also thinking of all my old friends in secondary school. At that time i made a decision, i will go for the get-together and miss out church for one time.

When i was about to call Lyn to inform her that I will not be going, I felt a calling from Him. A calling that will change my life in making decisions. A calling that i can be closer bonded with others and changing 4 of my friend’s life. At that time I made a 2nd decision, a final decision; i will go for the amazing race. But this time, i know i have not made the wrong decision. 4 of my friend namely Ling Yang, Wei Wei, He Bin, Yee Long. Ling Yang have been attending church cell and SNL for 1 month now and the rest are non-Christian too. IF i did not go for the amazing race, all 4 of them won’t be going too!!

Thank You God for letting me make the correct decision!! Because of this race I got closer to them which can make it easier for me to bringing them to church. They got to know more about our Lord too! And also how much Christians love You!! Truly God know which decision make me a better person!

If I am asked to go out during church service, I will choose church service and i will stand firm to my decision. =)

Do you know how joyful it is to be worshipping Him? When you sing and praise Him? When He answer your prayers? When you know you are protected and safe? When you know all of your brothers and sisters you love is always there for you, praying for you and encouraging you?

I know. I just know =) and I would like more people to know it too =)

So make the right decision today!!
-----------------------------------
Every moment i am living in this world, i will worship You.

A Letter from God

2005-06-09T11:58:00.000+08:00

My Precious Friend;

I am sending you this letter by way of one of My Disciples. I just wanted to let you know how much I love and care about you and how I greatly desire to become a meaningful part of your life.

This morning when you awoke, I was already there with you in the Light of my beautiful sunshine that filled your room. I was hoping that you would say good morning to me; you didn’t. So, I thought maybe it was a little too early in the day for you to notice me.

Again, I tried to get your attention when you stepped out of your door. I kissed your face with a soft gentle breeze. I breathed upon you my fragrant sweet breath scented with flowers. Then I sang you a love song through the birds in the trees. You just walked right past me.

Later on in the day, I watched over you as you were talking with some of your friends. Oh! how I wished that you would talk to me also. I waited and waited, but you just went along your way.

This afternoon I sent you a refreshing shower and glistened to you from each raindrop. I even shouted to you a time or two with thunder trying to get your attention. Then I painted you a lovely rainbow in the midst of my fluffy white clouds. I just knew you would see me then, but you were unaware of my presence.

This evening to close your day, I sent you a beautiful sunset. After that I winked at you a thousand times through my stars, hoping that you would see me and wink back. You never did.

Tonight, when you went to bed, I spilled moonlight upon your face to let you know that I was there with you. I was hoping that you would talk to me a little while before you went to sleep. You never said a word. It hurt me deeply; however, I continued to watch over you all through the night thinking that maybe, just maybe, you would say hello to me in the morning.

Each and everyday, I have revealed myself to you in many strange and wondrous ways hoping that you would know I am always here with you. For I am the only one that can supply you with all your needs. My love for you is deeper than the deepest ocean and bigger than the great blue sky. I have so very much to give to you and also share with you. Please let me hear from you soon.

Your loving friend forever;
Jesus

---------------------------------------

God is always with us. Blessing doesn’t always come in package you expected to see. He is always helping us in any ways possible and unexpected and mysterious ways that we will not notice. He can help us thru people around us, the little things around us, and the little events around us. God presence is always with us, observe your heart to surroundings. If I believe in what Christ did for me in the past and will to do for me in the future. But why do i not believe He can do anything for me now? Sometimes we look at things in a logical mindset that we miss his blessing.

He has so much to give us~ but sometimes we take things for granted. He is there, can you find Him? Search Him from within. Oh~ a gentle breeze just blew pass me… =) God is always there with us!!

Game Master and durian hunter!!

2005-06-09T00:09:00.000+08:00

I am the game master for this week!! muhaha i gonna think of some fun games. and puishments hehe. Pray that everyone will be able to come and be more closely bonded to Him and others!!

I will be going with lynn and Jack to hunt for durian in the forest!! hope we get some nice juciy durians!!Yummy!! who wanna join?? hehe

Things doesn't seem to be going for the people around me this few days.
2 of my friends is losing faith and i can hardly catch up on them. I have been praying for them. This concern their eternal life.. I cant let them go...and i wun

Amazing Race~~!! Amazing people!!

2005-06-08T14:19:00.000+08:00

Yesterday amazing race was fun!! I was too exhausted after the game that I am too lazy to blog =x I am an assistant team leader which I only knew 1 day before the game! The day before the amazing race, I was preparing starch with WeiJian and WanPing !! haha all the sticky stuffs !! Hope the ones playing the sticky game enjoy it hehe =x

My team has my leader Michelle, me, Zhen Wei, Fiona, Aldeine, Serene, Serena, Ervin, Ling Yang, Wei Wei, Yee Long and He bin and Desmond!. Although all of us were a bit shy at first but everything starts to work out after the ice breakers games ^^ everyone in the team is cool and cooperate with each other. We went last for the 1st rounds of games; everyone was quite low in morale because we have quite a bad start. But we chased up on Wei Jian team and team 13 on the bus!! Our first stop is Espernal( I don’t know how to spell.. T_T) When we reach there we have make a passerby wear a Santa suit (the shirt is black bin bag =x) as a task. After we are done with it, our next shop is coffee bin. We gonna piece a puzzle. Here we have our lunch!! Our lunch is sandwiches made by Michelle!! Ssooo sweet of her =) Next to Fort Canning Park. Kallang Mrt then Kallang Basin. And then to our last stop which is at Boat Key.

Our Team
Michelle: She is a sweet girl and our team leader!! She made us sandwiches and they taste great!! She was very calm (unlike me =P) in making decisions thru-out the game. And lead the group forward!! ^^ My friends kept talking about her after the game haha!!
Fiona another have been helping out to take care of the younger ones as well and are very on thru out the game ^^. Aldine, Serene, Serena, Ervin are the younger ones but they are so cooperative!! They participate happily in the games and have bond closer to each other. I hope they enjoyed the game =). Next is ZhenWei, I really don’t know what to do w/o ZhenWei and Michelle!! So I am so glad they are here!! She is the one who keeps on encouraging everyone!! When everyone was down in morale because of the walking, she will be cheering everyone up. She is very active in the games and takes good care of the younger members. She is very funny in some of the little actions she had. She said Yeelong who is 16 to be 18 haha !! and hebin who is 21 to be 18 !!! =P Ling Yang, WeiWei, Hebin and Yee Long are friends I brought to the games, they are shy at first but they soon blended in with rest as the race goes on! They told me they enjoyed the race !!

Funny Moments:
Fort Canning Park: As I was running, my bad zip got loose and open up! And some sandwiches and clothing dropped out = Hansel and Gretel! =x

While I was pouring drinks into another bottle it, miss target and got my bag wet !!

Kallang Basin: Our raft is sinking!!! but with Zhen Wei and Yee Long in the front =P I am quite afloat at the back ! =D While I was shouting 1,2,1,2.. Zhen Wei splashes some seawater into my mouth =X so salty !! haha..or ya..i dun have extras underpants..

Getting Lipsticks marks: We found a lady with lipstick and we managed to get 2 girls to put the lipstick on !! = 3!! Awesome !

I will upload pictures tml =)

Take a Stand

hi pple

Yay!

love

Not home yet

Marvelous Light

Father brother me

death

guitar

My wallet

Selling it away

Let it out

..

Time to make a stand

army

pack

A few hours before take off

God teach me to lean on YOU even even more!

uncle

thank God

Just wanna say this

=)

a day with rashes

Training ahead

Uncle is a happy man!

Trust and Obey

=)

Yi Camp

Continue on this Path

First Blog after Ns

Left, Left, Left Right

*yawns*

Bloggin(i couldn't think of a title)

Sacrifice

He loves us more than we love ourselves

Grasping for air

Giving up for God

Sharing in Town

Highlight in BOLD those that you did before!

The walk home

Sat

If we are the body of Christ

Strong girl

Funny moments for the week

Mixed

Street Evangelism

Influential & easily Influenced

beeP Beep

Studies Warriors

Relationship

Conf

3rd day at Asia Oceania Youth Conference

Sick but filled

Fasting

Blog

Room in my heart

Decision for Him

A Letter from God

Game Master and durian hunter!!

Amazing Race~~!! Amazing people!!

yawns